“Putting Up” Over Christmas

Whilst it might be the time to be cheerful (good will to all mankind and all that), the build-up to Christmas is notoriously stressful. From dealing with chaos all over the high street, to organising the dinner you (now regretfully) decided to cook on the big day, its a given that everything might get a little bit stressful. Basically, until the family are sat down for dinner and sipping on their sherry, you can’t relax. This time of year we’re all more focused on our relationships, and spending time with our loved ones is what we do, but are we being particularly hard on ourselves to be in a relationship?

It really is lovely to spend the nights in as a couple; binging on Netflix and cosying up to someone you love is what the winter months were made for. But we shouldn’t be settling, or simply “putting up” with someone for the duration of the season, just to ensure that we won’t be alone – and I fear that many of us do this, which definitely adds a whole load of unnecessary stress to our Christmases.

We’ve all been there; keeping up appearances and braving it, just so we have a date for that Christmas party. The truth is that we shouldn’t be gearing up for the new year and hoping that it can’t come fast enough, just so that we can call time on a relationship that we know, deep down, isn’t for the best. I experienced exactly this during one of my longest relationships; it hadn’t been good for a long time, but I always found ways to placate my anxieties about it. Christmas came and went; and it was the worst holiday I’d ever had. Using outside situations to make excuses for someone is futile. If its not working, a bit of mistletoe isn’t going to help. The problem is that we’re expected to be all smiles during this time, but if you’re trying to stick it out until January when you both know its wrong, you’ve got no chance of smiling.

Whilst it might be tempting to hibernate once the chill arrives, you shouldn’t be settling for something – or someone, who isn’t making those cosy nights in all they should be. The winter months are prime time for getting out there and meeting new people; surely there’s more fun to be had in that than there is in arguing over which Netflix series to watch with someone you’re actually not that into? It’s often thought that the new year is the right time for new starts, but what’s to say you shouldn’t be going into the new year with a smile on your face and a spring in your step? Break ups are always hard, whatever the time of year, and its no big deal whether you’re happily single or happily in a relationship – just as long as you’re happy.


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